Little White Lies

White Lies. We all tell them. Of course we do. We tell little white lies to get out of something or maybe to avoid further discussion or confrontation. "Oh, you’ll be in town next week. I’d love to get together but I have a major report due for work." or  "Can't come over, my child screams when in a car for longer than thirty minutes."  White lies. They do the deed–get you out of whatever–and at the same time allow the recipient to maintain their illusion that they are somewhat valued by you. 

But I wonder why do we tell white lies? When is it okay to do so? Who do we lie to? I guess little lies like the examples I mentioned above won't bother me as much. To get out of something. But I've noticed that some people lie constantly about little things that doesn't even matter. Well I guess it matters to them. Lying about knowing something when you really don't, lying about having something you don't have, lying about doing something that you really don't do. Lying to cause drama. Lying and skewing the truth just to be a martyr.

I’m trying to figure out why these lies bother me so much. It's one thing to tell little lies to strangers or acquaintances but what about those who are closer to us than that? Don't we owe our nearest and dearest the unvarnished truth?  It insults me that someone who knows me thinks I (or any of their closest friends/love ones) can be assuaged with lies.  Maybe what bothers me is that accepting them as truth requires me to be complicit in another’s obvious lie.

Most of the little white lies are normally explained by the fear of losing face or to show that you're better than that person or you lead a better life than they do. I don’t get it. Don’t you lose your face by knowing the that what you just told isn't the truth? My sense of righteousness is telling me, maintain your face and tell the truth.


Sometimes it’s hard to tell the truth. Sometimes it’s hard to take the truth. Sometimes we have to.